Dear Brothers and Sisters,
A Jewish marriage is in two parts. The first is the betrothal when Joseph and Mary are married to one another but do not live together. This betrothal lasts for one year and can only be broken by a divorce. It is a time for the couple to test their fidelity to one another. They cannot even touch the hair of the other no less anyone else. It is when the dowry is negotiated, so many camels, thousands of shekels, etc. It is a serious commitment that precedes the marriage celebration like the wedding feast of Cana. After the year the couple lives together as man and wife. If the woman is unfaithful during that time period, the punishment is death. When Joseph hears that his wife is pregnant, he is supposed to publicly renounce Mary. It is an extremely difficult time for him.
Jesus needs a father like all of us do. The father is the authority figure in the family. The mother is the heart, the one who loves. The mother has to lead the children to love the father and not to become too absorbed with the kids which is very easy to do if the husband works a lot or is distant from the wife and the kids. The mother leads the children to love and accept the authority of the father.
Joseph is like John the Baptist last week; he is full of doubts, anxious and afraid. How could his wife be in this situation. He understands nothing and it all seems to be a mistake. God is forming him as a father by allowing him to be a son. Joseph accepts this situation and waits for the Father to act. He hears a voice in his sleep. It is the voice of God, of his Father through an angel. Joseph does not run away from this pain. He knows that somehow it will bear fruit. He who now has the spirit of a son, trusts his father. He welcomes Mary into his home, which means he welcomes suffering.
In the icon of the Nativity in the eastern churches, Joseph is usually at the bottom left of the picture and there is an old hunchback man with a cane speaking to him. Joseph is looking down, his face is troubled and worried. This old man, who is the devil, confronts him and plants seeds of doubt in his heart. Joseph is like us; he reflects our disbelief and inability to accept difficulties in life. Eventually Joseph overcomes his doubts and becomes the father of Christ. What is the devil saying to him. This child is really from the Holy Spirit? Why did no one tell me anything? What am I supposed to do now?
The world today wants to destroy the father. In shows and sitcoms today, the father is usually a very weak or non-existent person. He is easily replaceable, so it seems. But without the father the family is extremely weak, and many serious complications arise for everyone.
Joseph gives the name to Jesus which means he takes responsibility for him. He is a father to him in all ways but one. Mary is quiet in this gospel. Her womb is the center of the universe. She silently adores her Son. Her adoration and thanksgiving leaves no room for words or deeds. Mary is the image of a Christian. The child can be born in us this Christmas. Let us make room for him in our lives, in our schedule and in our hearts this week.